Since we're going to Europe this summer, we started a weblog to help us collect our thoughts, as well as the thoughts of others. If you can, whoever you are, spend a minute or so there and give us any tips you might think are helpful. Also, if you know of anyone who might have useful information, pointing them to the site would be most appreciated.
This last week was pretty rough for me. I am not sure why, exactly. I think it was a combination of things, but I was (and kind of still am) very emotional and I feel weird. I have been all teary and pissy and mopey. I don't like it.
I had yesterday off and it was the best day of the week for several reasons: I finally got to see Shane. It was his last day at UPS, which hopefully will make his life less stressful. I went shopping and got a new pair of really cute capri jeans from the Gap and a pair new pair of Reef flip flops (the trendy kind...the ones I have wanted for two years. It took me two whole years to break down and buy them. They are very very cute). We bought plane tickets to Europe.
So, it's official. We are going to Europe. Our plane leaves LAX on the evening of June 18th and will take us to Paris. Yay! It is going to be a little tight. Shane graduates on the 14th and we have to move all of our stuff to a storage unit in San Diego county before the 18th, but we'll make it. It's exciting and I am so glad to have that out of the way. We also get a stop over in London from the 10th to the 14th of August on our way back with the deal. So we will be gone for about 8 weeks. I think it will be so cool to get away, not have to work and seeing everything there is to see over there. I am really looking forward to it.
I had a dream this morning that *someone* came in when they got home from work and rubbed my oh-so-sore legs and made them feel good as new. Except, it wasn't really a dream. It really happened. I have a very very sweet husband. My legs are ready for another night of running!
I feel like I ran a marathon last night, my legs are so tired. I wish I had a little mile counter thingy so I could see how many miles I run around each night. I can't even venture to guess. The night was busy, which made it go quickly, but it did not go as smoothly as I would have liked. I do believe, however, like the good Girl Scout that I am, that I left the place cleaner than I found it. My patients were stable and things were good. Hoping for a good night tonight....
I called my mom and dad last night. They are very happy to be home. I am looking forward to seeing the pictures and hearing their tales.
It is just about bed time.
My mom and dad get home from Europe tonight. They have been gone way too long. They should never be allowed to leave the country for so long again. I am glad they are coming back. Even though we live 300 miles away from each other, I missed them more than usual.
Shane has three mornings left of work. I think he is happy about it. I hope he is in better spirits after this week.
I am tired. I have to go back to work tonight. I have been there way too much lately. These pay checks better be worth it. I can only pray for good, quiet nights with sleeping patients. I kind of feel like I live at the hospital. I want to live at home. With Shane. This summer better get here soon. It's gonna rule.
You should go check out the photoblog we have put together. It isn't quite there yet, but it is well on it's way. Lots of pictures of sweet little Macy and all the fun stuff we do to fill our time. It looks very nice, thanks to Shane.
I have thought about it a lot lately and have decided that if I were to get a new car, well, I would get an old car. And not really a car, I guess. I am swooning over several different automobiles I see around town.
There is the Bronco. I don't know what year it is. Probably from the 60s or 70s. I would take it, rust and all.
Then there is the International Harvester. No one can deny that Scout's are cool.
There is also the Land Cruiser. It was for sale! I would even take one from the 89s and early 90s.
I love my little Jetta, but I think it would be so sweet to drive around in one of those. I would be pretty darn cool.
Last night, in my dream, our friend Ryan gave me a piece of paper that said "Kung Fu Fighting" on it. I don't know why. It was pretty cool. I never remember my dreams.
I thought I would share my thoughts on the recent rejection we have suffered here at the bonham foundation. As you might have read over on Shane's blog, we found out today we were not selected to be a part of Colonial House. I seriously can't believe we got as far along in the process as we did. A part of me was thinking it would be a very cool experience and as hard as it would be, I would go away from it a better person, blah blah blah. The other part of me was thinking it was five months. It was a ton of hard work. I just want to get on with my life. So, the decision was made for us and we will be getting on with our lives.
Two months as of today until Shane graduates. I have a lot to do. I have to plan this trip to Europe. I really want to go, but I am having a really hard time getting motivated to get it all planned out. It seems very overwhelming. I don't really know how much I need to plan it, though. I think we just want an idea of where we will go and to just cruise around, without serious plans. Like, ideas of places we want to go and so on. I need to do it. I have two days off after tonight, so maybe I will get started on it. It is hard to do anything when I am off. I just want to relax.
Easter is coming up and I have a feeling it will be like any other Sunday up here. I have to work Saturday night. I will come home very tired and struggle to stay out of the warm bed so that we can go to church. I will then struggle to get Shane out of bed and struggle to stay awake once at church. Then, we will come home. I will take a nap and Shane will study. Then it will be Monday.
So they called me in. At one in the morning. I was kind of out of it when I got there, but the rest of the night went by quickly and painlessly. My patients were easy and I got paid time and a half for being there. Pretty good deal, I guess.
Shane revealed a secret to us yesterday. I am really glad about it, actually. Hopefully he will be less stressed out and less antsy. That is one of the reasons I am working so much...to make up for him quitting. So, he will be working a lot more around the house, keeping things together and I will become the true bread winner. June will be here before I know it. I can't wait.
I was supposed to be at work right now. Instead, I am *on call*. Which means that I have to be available for the next 9 1/2 hours to go into work, should they need me. I am kind of glad that I am here. I guess I wouldn't mind going in if they needed me. I have signed up to work five shifts this week. That's 60 hours. And as much as I liked to look at the schedule and feel all good about myself, thinking that I was helping out the hospital and that I was going to have the beefiest pay check ever and how every time I would talk about how I was gonna work 5 nights and have everyone shake their head in disbelief, it's kind of nice to be off for one of those five nights. There will be five night weeks in the future and I will again be able to enjoy all of those things. Just not this week. Unless they call me in.
I can't stop laughing at these pictures.
Over the last few days, due to my work schedule and Shane's new school schedule this quarter, we have seen each other a total of like, a half an hour or something. (And I was half asleep for most of it). I get home from work, he is at work. I get up to get ready for work, he is at school. I go to work, he gets home from school. I think this is the way it's gonna be the next month or so. As I said, I am working a lot of extra shifts. The hospital just called me and asked me if I would work Saturday night. I don't really want to, but I feel bad. They only have one nurse scheduled and it would mean a little more money, but I don't want to drive myself to an early death. I also want to see my husband. And he will be home Saturday night. I have to think about it.
Tonight is my last night this week (if I say no to Saturday) and then I have two nights off. I know Shane will be busy all weekend with reading and catching up on work for school. I will try not to drive him crazy, begging for attention and entertainment. I am currently reading Gone with the Wind. I have tried to read it in the past and never could get into it. Well, I am officially into it this time and maybe I will spend even more time reading this weekend. Walking and reading and laying out. And sleeping at night.
I am about to start working my brains out. I have signed up for a crazy amount of shifts at work. I figure, we have about two months left here and I can hang in there, seeing there is an end in site. The hospital is desperate and the money will be very very sweet. I keep looking at the schedule in awe, wondering if I will make it through all of those shifts alive. I know I can do it...I just need to take it one week at a time and not let myself get overwhelmed. I think I will be spending more nights at work than I will in my bed. And when I think I can't survive another day, I can just think of Reuben, a respiratory therapist at work, who works, like 60 nights in a row and then takes a bunch of time off. Sixty twelve hour shifts in a row!?! I think I would kill myself. That is crazy.
Ladyblog is one today. Happy birthday, ladyblog. We'll save the cake for later.
I am loving that it is 7:00 right now and it is still light outside. And it's warm... t-shirt and shorts weather. Feels like summer. Gotta love it.
So my new passport arrived in the mail today, along with our new shirts from the plug. One for him and one for me. They are very, very cool.
Shane is studying his brains out and I am thinking about having to go to work tonight. The sweet thing is, tonight is only 11 1/2 hours, thanks to good old daylight savings time.
My husband has confessed to me that he has been having dreams about other women. Last night, he had a dream about Tasty Coma Wife. They didn't do anything...just "cuddled." The other day, he had a dream about someone else. It's kind of silly, but does he ever have dreams about me? Well, I appeared in the TCW dream, apparently, and told him very matter-of-factly that either he could leave or I would. So, I guess I am in them, but they aren't sexy dreams. Or cuddly dreams. Maybe he just doesn't tell me about the sexy ones. That must be it.
I just finished cleaning our dryer. Yes, I scrubbed the dryer. It appears that there were some grease pencils left in the pocket of Shane's work clothes that he washed and I put in the dryer. Well, they wrote on every inch of the dryer. In grease. So, I spent a total of about 2 hours cleaning out the dryer. I tried a few different things that claimed they would remove grease. They weren't talking about grease pencil grease. I finally turned to Goo-Gone, which worked great. What a job. Now it smells very citrusy in there. I had my head in the dryer, inhaling the stuff for two hours. I am hoping it is all cleaned out and that our clothes will come out dry and free of grease pencil. I don't know what I will do if they don't. I suppose I will either have to put up a clothes line or start going to the laundromat.
Oh how I miss my husband's sexy beard. I can't wait till the summer when he can grow all the facial hair his hot little face can handle. (He is pretty hot minus the facial hair, but very, very hot with it.)
I know there are many things Shane will not miss upon leaving UPS.
One thing I will not miss when he leaves UPS: grease pencils.
Last night was rough at work. I had a patient pass away on me. And the thing is, he wasn't really on his way out when my shift started. He wasn't doing well, like, he wouldn't really talk or anything, but he was pretty much stable.
So, about 1 am or so, he starts getting agitated and his blood pressure went up pretty high. I spent the rest of the night in his room at least every five minutes or so and really, I did everything I could. I called the doctors involved with him several times. I told them all I could. It was hard to tell what was going on, because he was pretty hard to figure out to start with. But something happened. He must have had a stroke or something and by 5 am he was pretty much unstable and eventually passed away. I know I did all I could. I really did. But I still feel bad about all of it. And it was so sad when his wife came in. They were in their late 80s. She was so distraught. She had lost her love. She didn't know what she would do without him. She called it all a cruel April Fool's day joke. It was heartbreaking. It was all very emotionally draining. I wish I could have done something to make it all easier, but I don't think there really was anything I could do. No words to make it better. I don't want to lose the ones I love.
So, I am sick now. I was last night. Coughing, coughing, coughing. I want to reach in and itch my lungs. Skipping work tonight and hoping it will be better tomorrow.
